When I’m in New York City, I never, or I should say, rarely, encounter questioning about my name or credential’s. We are a melting pot. People generally don’t make assumptions based on your name, they take the time to get to know you.
When I’m traveling outside of the city, to different states, I encounter questioning or stereotyping. To be honest, it is uncomfortable. It’s not my typical experience.
Recently, I made a purchase outside of New York, and the sales person, kept saying my name with an exaggerated Spanish accent.
So, you are “known yez Vazquez” “known yez Vazquez” huh. I think it’s better if I get someone else to help you.
I’m going to refer you to Ortega. I’m going to refer you to him instead. He speaks Spanish. But, I’m speaking to you in English, I interject. He is not listening, hang on he said, and he rushed off.
Sterotypes are alive and well. I can go to make a purchase and once they see my name, they refer me to the hispanic salesperson. We end up speaking English to each other.
Yes, I speak English. I am American, born in New York. My dad and uncles on both sides served in the US Army and Navy during World War II. We have generations before and after who served.
Most people won’t take the time to get to know you. They will make assumptions. They won’t ask you questions. They will work off of the experiences they have had..
Often times people are unaware of how they present. This will tell you a lot about a persons inner world.
People have predefined cultural narratives. They learned them through interactions within their communities. They are not based on actual facts, they’re just assumptions they have abaorbed.
Stereotyping simplifies things for people and it’s easier for them to process an interaction. If they can label someone or think that they’re inferior to them, it helps them to feel safe. It overlooks human depth and reality. It avoids real understanding and connection.
When people choose conversation over judgment or labeling, it’s a indication of their depth. They understand people are more than a label people try to place upon them. They are able to view each person as an individual.
Each of us view the world through a different lens. When people say or share negative thoughts or try to stereotype or label, it’s not about your worth.
Assumptions are less about truth than they are about someone’s need to feel in control and relevant. While, these actions are rooted in superiority, remember that peoples assumptions are not based on what they actually know to be true.
Always stay grounded in humility and empathy. You can’t go around correcting everyone’s ideas or thoughts, but you can protect your humanity.
In situations that are transactional, I stick to limited contact and disengage from too much explanation or conversation.
It’s interesting how quickly people make assumptions about others they don’t know. In those moments, I simply complete the interaction and move on without correcting or educating them.
Protecting time, energy, and peace is valid, and no one owes understanding to someone who hasn’t taken the time to understand you.
Nonesvazquez 
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