Sunrise

Today, I sat listening to the stories people shared about their 911 experience. I shared my own.  9/11 is here and gone, another anniversary. It is a emotional day for New Yorkers, First Responders, Americans and people all over the world who witnessed the attack.

In the years that follow, the impact of that day does not lessen, nor doed the loss disappear. Many died on September 11, and many who survived later developed cancer, respiratory illnesses, and other health conditions. For countless individuals, the memories, images, and trauma remain vivid to this day. I was affected, as were my family, friends, and neighbors.

My husband is now a retired first responder. He responded on 9/11 and was assigned to work at the site for a year afterward. On that day, and throughout his career, he faced and managed many significant challenges in service to others.

He never asks for anything, yet he gives so much. He is dependable, honest, and kind. To say he is a hard worker is an understatement. He can strike up a conversation with anyone and make them feel comfortable. He is humble and unassuming, with a remarkable ability to listen and understand people.

His quiet strength, dedication, and willingness to serve others have always inspired me. Like so many first responders, he carried the weight of difficult experiences while continuing to show up each day with courage, integrity, and compassion.

My husband’s exterior gives no hint of the depth of his being or offers any insight into his heart.  We have both developed the blank stare that living in the city conditions you to wear.

We grew up in these neighborhoods. We understood the challenges that can derail lives, and we made a conscious choice to build something different. We chose happiness. We chose each other. We became a team.

We have always enjoyed being together. His appreciation for the simple things in life endeared him to me. He has always gone out of his way to make me feel loved, comfortable, and cared for. This was especially true in the early days of our relationship. I never had to question his commitment—it was always there.

Not long after we met, we settled into a rhythm together. He told me he knew we would last and that one day we would be married.

He took me to his favorite places, and I shared mine with him. On Thursday evenings, we would walk up the block from my house to Neir’s Tavern to listen to live music. Other nights, we would make dinner at home, watch television, and eventually fall asleep intertwined on the couch.

Over the years, our lives have been marked by both great love and profound loss. I remember a motorcycle trip to Nova Scotia to ride the Cabot Trail. We were sitting in a pub, listening to a band, surrounded by the beauty of the moment. Yet even there, bad news found us. A phone call interrupted the evening. Another friend was gone—another life lost to illnesses linked to exposure.

Almost twenty five years later, 9/11 still affects us. Each year brings new calls—unsolicited, unwanted, and without warning. Another diagnosis. Another loss. Another reminder that the events of that day did not end when the towers fell. Prayers and affirmations alone cannot keep the cancers away.

The experiences we have lived through have made us keenly aware of the importance of gratitude and appreciation. Life is fragile, and time is precious. Daily events continue to remind us not to spend our energy on negativity or relationships that diminish our well-being.

Over the years, I have learned to say goodbye to unhealthy friendships and to create space for people who bring honesty, kindness, and sincerity into my life. My husband, always the realist, often says, “Good riddance.” He has little patience for people who are disingenuous. Rather than hoping they will change, he accepts people for who they are and moves forward.

I grew up with a mother who believed in finding the good in everyone. She taught us to lead with kindness and compassion. My husband is often quick to point out the limits of that philosophy. While he appreciates the sentiment, he believes that not everyone is willing or able to meet us with the same goodwill we extend to them.

Together, we have learned to be discerning. We choose to distance ourselves from people who create division, thrive on conflict, or treat others with cruelty. We still believe in the good that people are capable of, but we also understand that each person must choose their own path. In the end, people reveal themselves through their actions, and we have learned to pay attention.

Life brings us many events and lessons we never ask for. For first responders, however, facing the unexpected is part of the job. The delivery of a baby during a call can bring immense joy. Responding to tragedy, violence, and loss can leave lasting emotional scars.

Many first responders will simply say, “I’m just doing my job.” They push their feelings aside so they can keep going. They do it to serve others, to answer the next call, and to be there when people need them most. Because of that, we must remember to be there for them as well.

These experiences have taught us to appreciate every act of kindness, no matter how small. We find joy in the beauty of ordinary moments—a simple meal at home, a walk after dinner, or time spent together at the end of the day.

My husband often calls me outside to watch the sunset. He reaches for my hand, and we sit together in quiet companionship. In those moments, words are unnecessary. There is only gratitude, understanding, and the comfort of being together.

On weekends, we always looked forward to spending the day together. We would ride for hours on the motorcycle, traveling through small towns, farmland, and winding country roads. Along the way, we discovered hiking trails, waterfalls, streams, and places we had never seen before. We thrive when immersed in the healing beauty of nature.

The outdoors has a way of restoring the spirit. It reconnects us to what is sacred and real. Nature offers space to reflect, heal, and reconnect with ourselves and with each other.

I often point to the clouds and trace the shapes and outlines they create against the blue sky. The skies seem endless and beautiful. At night, the constellations emerge overhead, reminding us of the wonder that exists beyond our everyday lives. A reminder that heaven does exist.

We were always a little sad when it was time to return home. Eventually, we decided to create a place of our own beyond the city. We bought more than a house—we bought peace, quiet, and an escape from the demands of everyday life.

We threw ourselves into renovation projects, swinging hammers, wielding paintbrushes, and learning as we went. Proud of every improvement, we eagerly shared our before-and-after iPhone photos with anyone patient enough to listen to our renovation stories.

With each project completed, the house became more than a retreat. It became a reflection of our life together. In the process, we found even more happiness.

We stand at the top of the  hill and look across the open land. We smile and laugh and plan.  Life won’t get away from us. We are still here.

There is not much that you in can do to ease the pain of loss. It forever lingers as does the realization that we are promised nothing.  There will be heartbreaks. Each sunrise is a gift of a new beginning. Every plan we make offers the promise of tomorrow, of hope and healing.

Our heightened awareness of world events serves as a constant reminder of the thin line between this life and the next. We continue to watch the world change, sometimes in ways that inspire hope and sometimes in ways that bring sorrow.

We pray for peace, for wisdom, for justice, and for unity. We carry the weight of tragic events and the suffering they leave behind, yet we continue forward. We grieve, we reflect, and we endure, holding on to the belief that kindness, compassion, and understanding still matter.

We keep going in order to have stability and to acknowledge, the gift of life. We are all everyday heroes.   After a storm we can find the beauty that exists, focus on the beauty.

We keep moving forward, seeking stability while honoring the gift of life. In our own way, we are all everyday heroes. After every storm, there is beauty to be found if we are willing to look for it.

Life itself is the gift. It comes with no promises of perfection and no guarantee of freedom from hardship. It is our responsibility to create better environments for ourselves and for others. Despite the troubling headlines and the drama that often surrounds us, we can choose to create circles of love, kindness, and understanding.

How much joy can be found in the ordinary. The simple act of being, of sharing a meal, a conversation, a sunset, or a quiet moment with someone we love, is a gift. There is little more I could ask for.

Share kindness whenever you can. The storms that arrive at our door test us, but they also reveal our strength. We each have the ability to carry light into darkness and love into places that need it most.

As long as we are here, we have the blessing of today. Each sunrise brings another opportunity to begin again, another day filled with hope, purpose, and promise.